Friday, January 27, 2017

Long Distance Dating

How is it possible to miss someone so much that you've only known for such a short time? 10 weeks ago I met a wonderful man. My new beginning. We met on a cruise over Thanksgiving and when the cruise ended, we decided to get together in January. Six weeks would pass before we would see each other again. And yes those six weeks were difficult but we managed. And then I flew to Texas to see my new beginning for a weekend.  And saying goodbye to him at the airport on Sunday was much more difficult than I had ever anticipated. I missed him. A lot. Two weeks later, on the spur of the moment, I flew to Texas to see him again. And it was even better than our first weekend. When I flew home on Sunday I was sad but I knew I would see him again on Monday since I was returning to Texas for work. So for the first time since we met, we spent five whole days together. And then I had to return home to Florida.  

And now my heart hurts. My heart aches for him. I miss him in a way I never thought possible. As our love grows and our commitment to one another grows, the time between visits becomes increasingly difficult.  As our relationship becomes deeper and we plan a future, it becomes harder to survive with only monthly weekend visits.  Yes, we already have our next weekend on the calendar. And fortunately it is only three weeks away.  But it is going to be a very long 3 weeks.  He has become such an important part of my world. In such a short time. Just after saying goodbye, I miss him terribly.  My heart does not understand why we have to be separated for weeks at a time.  Why I can't see the love in his eyes everyday.  My body craves his touch. To feel his lips on mine. To feel his hand on the small of my back. To be wrapped in his arms and know I am safe in his love.  I never knew I could need someone as I need him.  I not only want my new beginning, I need him.  I need him in my life. In my heart.  In my future.  But the wait until we can be together is going to be miserable.  Unbearable.  But, hopefully, oh so worth it.  

Long distance dating isn't for the faint of heart.  It's hard work.  But it does allow us to talk about anything.  And everything.  And to become closer in 10 weeks than most couples do in a lifetime.  Yet, I still long for the time when we don't have to constantly saw goodbye.  I long for the day we become a forever family.  When I no longer have to miss him for weeks at a time but instead can kiss him hello every morning.  And goodnight every night.  Until we can begin our future together.



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