Family

Today I am thinking of my in-laws.  Jared's family.  And how hard it must be for them to see someone new in mine and Steven's life.  To see someone else where we all wish Jared could be.  Should be.

I want Jared's family to know they will always be my family.  Our family.  Always welcome.  Always wanted. I need them. Steven needs them.  He needs to hear their stories.  Feel closer to his dad by spending time with them.

I hope they know that being with Jon in no way diminishes my love for Jared.  I will always love Jared.  Miss him.  Wish he were here. Jared will always be a part of our family.  His name will always be spoken.  His stories will always be shared.  Just because he died doesnt mean he ceases to exist.  Jared will always be Steven's dad. He will always be my husband.  Jon will never replace Jared.  No one ever could.  And Jon doesn't want to.  Jon understands that Jared will always be part of our family.  He encourages it.  He often asks about Jared.  Mentions his name.  In his own way, Jon loves Jared too.

I know it's hard for Jared's family.  But I like to think Jared is happy for me.  For Steven.  I believe he wants us to love.  And to be loved.  Afterall, he made me promise.  And the best way I can think to honor my promise, honor Jared, honor his life is to live our lives to the fullest.  A life full of love and laughter.  A life full of joy.  A life full of family. Jared's family.  My family.  Our family.