Weaving The 2 Chapters Of My Life

Last week I did something I never thought I would do. I took my new beginning to meet Jared.  

It was completely unplanned.

We were driving through town and I asked Jon if he would mind if we stopped at the cemetery. He didn't even hesitate. We stopped at the store to buy flowers and a Twix bar since Steven always leaves candy for Jared.  At the cemetery I told Jon he didn't have to get out if he didn't want to. He looked at me like I was crazy. He was very sweet and followed behind Steven and I giving us some time alone. When we arrived at the graveside, Steven and I knelt to clean off the headstone. Steven then placed his Twix on the ground for his dad and said hello.  He then went to climb the wall around the cemetery. That is what he does. Jared once told Steven that when he was having fun on earth, Jared would be having fun in heaven. So Steven always finds a way to have fun at the cemetery. As I watched Steven climb onto the wall, my heart began to ache. No little boy should have to visit his dad at the cemetery. And again I wished with all my soul that Jared could be with us. And I just started to cry.  

As my heart broke, Jon wrapped his arms around me and held me. He held me as I cried for Jared.  Cried for what was.  Cried for what can never be.  Cried for a little boy trying to make his dad smile in heaven.  Cried for a wife, now a widow, trying to make her husband proud. Cried for a man gone too soon. And when my sobs stopped, Jon wiped my tears.   He then went to help Steven and give me a few minutes alone with Jared.  When they returned to the graveside, Steven and I kissed Jared goodbye and headed back to the car.  Once again, Jon let us walk ahead giving us some time.  

I never imagined that I would ever be introducing my new love to my first love.  And especially not at the cemetery.   But life does not always follow our plan.  Surprisingly, it just felt right.  Jon needed to see that part of our lives.  And it seemed the  appropriate time.  I didn't need to go to the cemetery to tell Jared about Jon but, for some reason, I wanted to.  Once again, weaving the two chapters of my life together.