Hard mommy night

Tonight was a hard mommy night. After his football game tonight, my son was crying.  H was upset because he said he has no one to practice with, play football with, or teach him better plays.  My husband was such an active dad.  He was truly one of those hands on dads, always involved. And now for the last 13 months my son has had to do all his sports activities alone. I offer to throw  a football with him or play catch or kick a ball around or try to help him, but all he wants is his dad.
These times are the hardest for this grieving mom. All I want to do is fix it, but I cant. Because no matter how hard I try I will never be his dad. And no matter how hard I wish or how hard I pray, I can never bring his dad home. Such a hard life lesson that my little boy has to learn at such a young tender age.
I told my son he could use his grief for good and use it to fuel his passion and succeed at anything he wants, in honor of his dad or he could let his grief cripple him and knock him down. He said he wants to use it to fuel his passion but that is really hard to do right now. I told him I completely understand. There are days I too want to let my grief cripple me but I can't.  I have to make a choice everyday to live or to give up. And I choose to live. As an adult I can understand that, I can handle that. But no child should have to learn this lesson. No child should have to learn that they have to handle their grief. But my little man looked at me and said i want to use my grief to honor my dad.  I was so proud of him and so heartbroken all at the same time.