Year 2 Day 6 of 7

Day 6 of 7

Today I miss Jared more than words can say. Today I miss having a partner. I miss having someone to share the load.  I miss Steven having his dad.  No matter how hard I try, I will never be able to fill the void of his dad.  And on days like today, when I am stressed and frustrated it is obvious that I have not perfected this solo parenting thing. But thankfully Steven has many wonderful memories of time spent with his dad. Like the spring of 2008, when Steven was not even four years old and the Grand Prix was in St. Pete. Jared took Steven down for the day and they sat on the bleachers and watched the races. Steven had such an amazing time with his dad.  Jared came back to tell me the story of how they met Danica Patrick. He said she walked up and started talking to Steven and was commenting on what a cute little boy he was. He said then two men approached her and wanted to talk to her and she told him to leave her alone, she was talking to the little boy. He said she finished talking to Steven and she walked away without even acknowledging those men.  Steven will never remember meeting her, but it was a story Jared loved to tell. Every year after that, Jared would take that Friday off and take Steven to the Grand Prix. Steven has so many memories of time spent with his dad. His dad coaching his football team.  His dad coaching his baseball team. Riding the dirt bikes with his dad. Playing catch in the yard. Sitting on the floor playing video games together.  His dad helping him with his homework. Their weekly trip to Joey Brooklyn's for pizza. Jared was a great dad.  And Steven will always know just how much his dad loved him.  When Steven was little, he would always say "me and my dad.". Me and my dad are going to do this. Me and my dad are going to do that. I always wondered if somehow Steven knew that his daddy's time on earth would not be as long as we would hope.  I will always be grateful that Steven has 10 years of wonderful memories with his dad. And I have scrapbooks full of pictures that captured those moments especially this one that captured their matching dimples.